I am not this stupid...usually

I swear, I'm not this stupid.  Really.

Yesterday I had to go grocery shopping and my mind was elsewhere.  I knew what I needed.  Chicken.  Milk.  Cheese.  Easy enough.  Our grocery store has some of the worst "fresh" chicken I've ever tasted though so I was looking for a different brand that might taste better.  And there I see the Perdue Farms chicken breasts.  Individually wrapped so you can use what you want and freeze the rest.  I needed 3 pieces, it came with 5.  I'm thinking "This will work."

SO I do what I always do and read the label.  Mostly to see how many ounces each chicken breast was but something caught my eye.  There in big bold letters were the words:
"Vegetarian Diet."

Huh?  Vegetarian diet?  But it's CHICKEN.  Chicken is not a vegetable.  So I stare at the chicken through the plastic thinking "Is this some kind of soy based fake chicken?  Why would they put soy based fake chicken in the meat section?  Shouldn't this say soy based fake chicken instead of chicken breasts on the label?  HOW IS IT VEGETARIAN???" 

I'm so glad I didn't say any of that out loud.

Because then I realize that it wasn't calling the product vegetarian...it was simply stating that the product ATE a vegetarian diet. 

I swear, I am not this stupid.

The House is still standing...barely

So either the crockpot is the safest kitchen appliance EVER or I am one lucky girl.  Seriously.

Yesterday I decided to make a crockpot meal because, let's face it, it's so much easier to dump a bunch of ingredients in a slow cooker, let them cook themselves, and then move on with your day than it is to actually cook dinner.  So I pulled the crockpot from the closet, threw in my ingredients, put it on low and left for the day.

For the DAY.

The meal magically cooked itself, as all crockpot meals do.  We happily ate and I went to start cleaning up the mess.  I noticed as I spooned the remainder of the Swiss Casserole Chicken into a bowl that the stoneware didn't seem to be level in the bottom of the heating base.  I didn't think much of it.  Until I removed the stoneware.

And realized that a Swiffer Duster Refill had somehow landed in the heating base.  It was just laying there.  It wasn't even burnt.  I suppose I could have kept it and used it but I was so shocked to find it in there that I threw it away (as quickly as I could without hubs noticing what I was pulling from the crockpot).

So, one of two things happened.  Either I'm crazy and I store my swiffer duster refills in my crockpot OR when my mom came to visit and we hastily cleaned up the kitchen, MH saw the duster refill laying out, threw it in the closet (with it landing in the heating base) and I then threw the stoneware in the heating base, you know, where it GOES, without realizing the swiffer refill was in there because I'm short and couldn't actually see into the base. 

My bet is the second scenerio is what happened.

Either way, my house did not catch on fire and I am very thankful for that.